Naruto Hogwarts Oo
by Momo Mirasaki
Summary: This is what happens when you use accio incorrectly and summon people from a whole other story I suck at writing but please RxR flamers are wanted too *ON HIATUS*
1. Chapter I:Accio What?

Naruto + Hogwarts = O.o  
WARNING:RANDOMNESS INSURED!!!!!!!!!!!and there is no major plot line XD  
I got bored and had this idea in my mind forever so ya here it goes :(I don't own Naruto Harry Potter or the musical lyrics used in wacky fic)

Chapter I:Accio what?!?

It was a nice normal day in Kohona (well as normal as normal can get seeing as the sand siblings were in town) everyone was out at the ramen shop. (Yes even Tsunade was there)  
"Hey what's that shiny bright thingy in the sky?"Naruto asked  
"The sun dumbass!"Sasuke said  
" No its not!!!Okay well maybe it is but I'm talking about that!"naruto retorted pointing to a huge circle that was now consuming the sky.(or so it appeared that way)  
" what the-"Sasuke never finished that sentence as they got sucked into the hole. After a couple of seconds everyone landed on top of each other with a huge thud.

"O-M-G! IT WORKED!" a female voice sqealed."It worked! It worked! It really really worked! "Kailey sang as she danced around in a circle when Raven and Sakurahime whacked her on the back of the head  
" Yes I'm shocked too your stupid idea actually worked now CALM THE FUCK DOWN!" Raven said  
"ouch! Sempai that really hurt!" Kailey whined

"Yeah?Well it's gonna hurt more if you don't shut up! Look!"Raven said pointing to the frightened looking Naruto characters behind them.  
"Oops! My apologies! Im Inu Kailey and you are in Hogwarts School of witchcraft and wizardry!" the preppy brunette said cheerfully  
"uh...I think I drank too much"Tsunade said  
" same here!" multiple peopled mumbled  
"okay before you guys say anymore number one no you are not drunk,dead,asleep and so on number two this was all an accident! Kailey being her stupid self thought it would be fun to see what happened when she said'accio Naruto and friends' which leads to number three meaning this was all just some freak accident," raven took a second to take a breath. " We don't know how to send you back" she finished glaring at Kailey who gulped.

"Sorry!"kailey said  
" Its okay hinamori I mean you did summon some of the most awesome people here and now we know not to leave you,a Naruto manga,a wand, and spell book in a room for more than a minute "Andrew laughed as Kailey glared at him evily  
"okay not helping!"Sakurahime said  
"Okay…so what do we do now?"Raven questioned.  
" Well we can't take them any where down stairs imagine what professor McGonagall would do to us especially me!" Kailey said  
"But we have no choice might as well take them to the teachers now get expelled and have some cookies before making matters a shit load worse by hiding them." Joey said

"True…hmmm let's go!" Raven said holding the door open for everyone to exit making sure to whack Kailey again for getting everyone expelled. They made their way up to the headmistress's office knocking on the door  
"Come in." A woman replied Kailey gulped as everyone shoved her to go first. Kailey opened the door "Ah yes miss Inu what do you need?" "Ummm…ummmm…"Kailey started crying "I summoned people from another world!!!!!!WAHHHHHHHHHH!!!"


	2. Chapter II:They can stay!

Chapter II: They can stay?!

Professor McGonagall stared blankly at the girl  
" well we might as well see what's going on here." She said going downstairs she took all the Naruto characters into an empty classroom with her along with several teachers and the sorting waited outside and half of them were asleep when professor McGonagall came out a smile on her face "  
I would like to introduce to you guys Hogwarts newest students!" she said when we looked up at the characters all the young adults had black robes on and house symbols on them.

"Really????!!!!!They can stay!?" Kailey and Joey exclaimed  
"yes now I would like for Miss Raven and Miss Joey to show the Slytherins to their dormitories"  
"Okay!" The girls replied as they walked down the hall Itachi, Sasori, Pein, and a few others following them.  
"Miss Kailey take the Ravenclaws to their dormitories if you would please not cause anymore damage." "  
Yes mam!" Kailey squeaked as Deidara, Sasuke, Konan ,Ino, Shikamaru ,Temari ,Ten-Ten and a couple more people followed her up the stairs and not down like the Slytherins.

"Mister Andrew you know where to go." He nodded his head  
"C'mon Hufflepuffs!" he said Sakura, Lee, Kankuro, Shino, and Kiba following him down the hall and up the stairs  
"Now everyone else follow Sakurahime to the Gryffindor dormitories." Sakurahime began walking everyone following "  
Sweet!" Naruto yelled at the top of his lungs a huge grin on his face boy what a year this was going to be.

If anyone ever in the history of ever reads this and you wanna be a character in here just send me a message or leave a review with your characters info P.S I know the chapters are pretty short right now but don't worry I'll try and make them better as I go along in the story

~Momo~


	3. Chapter III: Let the Party Begin!

I would like to thank alchemist_vampire_ninja5595 and li21si for reviewing ^^ I didn't even think anyone would read this (XD) and I would like to welcome to the story Abby!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!YAY! New character!!!!!!!!!!!!^^ well you know as usual I own nothing now ON WITH THE STORY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Oh wait (XD) I'm going to make a list of the character pairings and houses:

Slytherins: Itachi, Sasori, Pein, Chouji, Hidan, Kazaku

Ravenclaws: Deidara, Sasuke, Konan, Ino, Shikamaru, Temari, Ten-Ten

Hufflepuffs: Sakura, Lee, Kankuro, Shino, Kiba,

Gryffindors: Naruto, Konohamaru, Hinata,

Eh I'm pretty sure I forgot alot of people and all that but I wanna write sooooooooooo let the story BEGIN!!!!!!!!!(For real this time and I'll list the pairings at the end XD)

Chapter III: Let the Party Begin! ^^

Everyone was tired the next day when classes were to begin everyone had already got their schedules so the only thing left was to await their wands which had been paid for by Kailey (Yeah I made her rich XD) seeing as it was her doing that brought them here but she didn't mind.  
"I'm tired!!!!!!!!!!!Let me sleep five more minutes!"Naruto whined as he went down the stairs wearing his new robes.  
"If I can't sleep in what the hell makes you think you can?!" Konohamaru demanded pushing Naruto who fell in to a brunette girl.

"That HURT!!!!!!!!!!"Naruto yelled at Konohamaru who ran off  
"I'm sorry!"Naruto said as he stood up.  
"Well watch it next time if you please it would be appreciated"Abby said as she stood up and dusted off her robes  
" Okay I promise it won't happen again uhhhh what's your name?"Naruto asked walking along side Abby."  
I'm Abby nice to meet you…um…"Abby looked at him questioningly

"Naruto my name's Naruto Uzumaki!"The boy exclaimed  
"Interesting name. So which house are you in?"Abby asked as they went down the 5th floor stairs.  
"Gryffin-thing-a-ma-bober!"Naruto replied  
"Oh Gryffindor I'm in Ravenclaw." She said as they turned the corner and continued down to the 3rd floor.  
"Oh yeah that word so are you a ninja too?" Naruto asked" Cause you don't look like one of us…"  
Abby laughed" Ninja?! I'm no ninja I'm a witch and you have to be a wizard if you're here right?"  
Naruto blinked"I guess so..." he replied

"Well see ya!"Abby said smiling as they entered the Great hall and she went over to the Ravenclaw table.  
"BYE!!!!!"Naruto yelled waving as he sat down at the Gryffindor observed the food on the table  
"Ramen..."He mumbled  
"What?"Hinata asked  
"Ramen...there's no ramen.."Naruto said his body shaking.  
"Well yeah it's breakfest time Naruto-kun!"Hinata said "!!!!!!!"Naruto yelled before fainting Hinata and Konohamaru catching him barley before he hit the floor the entire Hall was staring at them.

"uhhhhhhhh......he's practing for a...play..Yeah a play!right Hinata?" Konohamaru said  
"Umm...Yeah!!!!!!"Hinata agreed  
"Let's get him outta here!"Konohamaru whispered to Hinata who nodded her head they carried him out of the Great Hall.  
"Hahahahaha the Dobe fially met his match!'Sasuke laughed  
"Seriously!Who would've thought it only took no ramen at breakfest time to knock the kid out!'Pein Said  
"Wait...Why didn't you think of that?!"Pein yelled at Itachi  
"oh Shut up like you had any luck!"Itachi said.

"WHY I OUGHTA!!!!"Pein yelled about to leap at Itachi but Konan held him back  
"Nagato!Calm down!"Konana said  
"Yeah!"Raven agreed helping Konan make him sit down.  
"Ugh fine but you better watch it weasel.."Pein replied sitting at Ravenclaw table...  
"Ugh Temari why do you always have your hair up in pigtails?"Ino asked  
"Cause I like them do you have a problem with them?"Temari replied  
"YEAH!they're so ugly and outta style!"Ino scoffed  
"You'll pay for that barbie hoe!"Temari yelled punching Ino.

"HEY!"Ino yelled about to punch Temari when chouji held her back and Shikamaru held Temari back  
"LET GO!"Both girls yelled Temari hit Shikamaru in the you-know-where area with her foot.  
"DAMN WOMAN!"Shikamaru yelled as he fell on the floor writhing in pain  
"Well I told you to let go didn't I?So I there by gave you a fair warning so HA!"Temari yelled  
"Whats going on here?"Professor McGonagall asked as she and the other teachers came down to the scene.  
"I was about to kick miss Barbie hoe's butt!"Temari barked as chouji let Ino go.

"Like hell you were!"Ino yelled  
"Well looks like we need to go to my office."Professor McGonagall said "Follow me girls."She ordered and walked out of the hall both girls following while chouji helped Shikamaru up.  
"Now what did we learn today?"Chouji asked Shikamaru  
"Ugh that Temari's a bitch."Shikamaru replied  
"Uh yeah that too,but what else?"Chouji said  
"I don't know..."Shikamaru replied  
"We learned that we listen to Temari cause she always aims low."Chouji laughed.

~End of Chapter~

;)

Authors note:

Okay so I just wanted to let people who want a character in the story to know what info I need:

Name:

Age:

Looks:

House (at Hogwarts):

If they play Quidditch, which position:

And anything else you want to add thanks :)

~momo~


	4. Chapter IV: First class of the year

Like usual I don't own anything but the oc's (sadly you can all cry now ;P)

Now on with the STORY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

*epic background music plays*

Chapter IV: First class of the year:How to ride broomsticks?!

Temari and Ino got 2 months of detention having to help filch clean up the school(mainly the bathrooms) School was about to start when Professor McGonagall had all the new 'transfer' students join her and madam Hooch down at the Qudditch field where they would learn how to ride a broomstick.  
"Okay class it's really simple place your hand above your broomstick and say up!With feeling!"Madam Hooch said as she walked along the rows of ninja/wizards.  
"UP!"Could be heard across the field many suceeding on their first try others on the other hand...  
"UP!!!!"Naruto yelled at his broom which barley twitched.

"Haha!"Sasuke and Konohamaru laughed at him.  
"Oh shut it!"Naruto barked picking up his broom.  
"Okay now that everyone has their brooms mount it tightly kick off the ground,hover for a second,lean down slightly and make a clean landing!on my mark 3...2...1!"Madam Hooch said blowing her so the began many people flew into each other while others crash landed across the field Naruto was lucky enough to be one of the people who stayed in the air.

"TAKE THAT-"Naruto yelled as he rammed into a wall.  
"Hahaha stupid Dobe!"Sasuke yelled as he passed Naruto.  
"Grrr!!!!!"Naruto yelled running after sasuke and jumping on his broom  
"Hey!Watch it!"Sasuke yelled as his broom swirved crash landing into the ground.  
"SASUKE!"Sakura,Ino,and Karin yelled running over to where Sasuke and Naruto landed.  
"Are you okay Sasuke-Kun!?"all three s asked leaning over sasuke  
"Hey isn't anyone worried about me?!"Naruto cried  
"NO NOW SHUT UP!!!!Wait...YOU HURT SASUKE!DIE!!!!!!!"The s yelled launching at Naruto and beating him senseless.  
"Poor,poor Naruto I would've thought he learned NOT to mess with the fangirls long ago...."Kakashi sighed  
"Hey that just means his has a thing for woman!You go get them Naruto!!!!"Jiraiya yelled as Tsunade punched him  
"Ugh I Would've thought you would learn NOT to ENCOURAGE being a PERV!"Tsunade sighed "But I guess that's a cause lost..."

~3 hours later at the hospital wing~

"So altoghter only one person avoided getting hurt?"Professor Sprout asked  
"Yup...the little boy named Konohamaru he some how managed to stay in the air and avoid collision his is a miracle among those ninja...now we learned an important lesson ninjas plus broomsticks equals DISASTER."Professor McGonagall sighed.  
"Oh really that didn't occur to you at first?"Professor Sprout laughed patting Minevra on the back before walking away.  
"Not really....."Minevra mumbled to herself as she entered the Hospital wing  
"How are they?"She asked madam Pomfrey  
"Hmmm they'll be fine." Madam pomfrey said  
"Thank goodness.."Professor McGonagall sighed

"But...the boy with blue hair he now has a fear of....."  
"Of what?" Minevra asked  
"Of....Stupid-Blonde-Fox-Demon-Boys...and he's so young too what a shame..." Madam Pomfrey said wiping her eyes then going to her office leaving Minevra alone and quite confused  
"....Stupid-Blonde-Fox-Demon-Boys?What in the world?...oh well I guess that's enough drama for one day....."She said making her way downstairs who knew one little task as riding a broom would cause sooooooo much damage...well obviously McGonagall didn't otherwise she MIGHTA thought it BETTER NOT TO TRY and teach ninjas how to fly oh well I guess we make our mistakes......NOT!!!!

~End of Chapter~

Pssshhh I know this chapter sucked but I was kinda in a hurry so I apologize for wasting your guy's time I would like you guys to know I like Flamers just as well as comments cause they help me get better at writing and I don't call it being rude I call it creative Critisim so if you wanna point out an error I made and such don't think you're being rude cause you're not thanks for reading and for all the reviews until next time!

~momo~


	5. Chapter V: Potions please

Chapter V: Potions please, you mean PAR-TAY!

I own nothing like usual thanks for the faves and reviews

songs used in this chapter:

Daphne and Celeste - Ugly

Spice Girls( I don't know the songs name I use just about three lines out of it though)

It was day two for our ninja friends at Hogwarts. The Gryffindors and Ravenclaws starting off the day with potions:

The late bell rang as the last of the students walked in to the drafty dungeon where the potions class was held taught by Professor Severus Snape. He carefully student the new students with little interest but still had a feeling they were trouble.  
" Take out your textbooks today since Headmistress McGonagall has requested I stop with the deadly poisons for a while we shall now do a simple antidote so simple not even Longbottom can not ruin it."Snape said in a bored voice as half the class rolled their eyes.  
"Hi Naruto!" Abby said as she took a seat next to him.  
"Hey Abby!" Naruto said turning to face Shikamaru who sat on his other side.  
"See told you she wasn't imaginary!" The blonde gloated as Shikamaru rolled his eyes and Abby looked creeped out.  
"Okay…I guess."She said turning to face the front when Snape hit the textbook on their table.  
"Eeek!"Abby yelled as almost everyone jumped out of their seats.

"20 points from Gryffindor and Ravenclaw." Snape said walking to his former position at the front of the class when the door opened three people, 2 girls and one blonde boy walked in.  
" Inu and Hime why are you late again?" Snape demanded as the they took their seats Kailey sitting next to Naruto and Abby Deidara and Sakurahime Sitting behind them  
"Cause the bell rang early I don't know snape-o-smelly-o just take the points and get it over with!" Kailey yawned  
"Grrrr 100 points from Gryffindor and Ravenclaw and detention for one month!" Snape yelled.  
"psshhh hey Kai-kai you still doing it?"Abby asked  
"You bet we just need one more person.." Kailey said both girls instantly looking at Naruto  
"Ohhh Naruto!"

~10 minutes later~

Kailey and Abby stood on their table.  
"I AM TIRED OF THIS!!!!!DO YOU WANNAKNOW WHAT WE WANT!?" Abby and kailey both yelled  
"INU ABBY SIT DOWN!"Snape hissed when Deidara,Naruto,Sakura-Hime,Harry,Hermione, and a few others stood on their tables as they all sang:

Everyone: Tell me What you want what you really really want!

Abby & Kailey: Oh tell me what you want what you really want!

Everyone: I wanna,I wanna, I wanna,I wanna, I wanna really really tell you how ugly you are!*points at Snape*

Sakura-Hime nodded her head giving the signal as everyone except a few people began to sing again

Everyone(not Deidara,Naruto,Abby, and Kailey):

OK! I'M A CHEERLEADER NOW!

U.G.L.Y.  
YOU AIN'T GOT NO ALIBI YOU UGLY  
EH! HEY! YOU UGLY X4

I SAW YOU WALKING DOWN THE STREET JUST THE OTHER DAY  
I DIDN'T SEE YOUR DAMAGE FROM THAT FAR AWAY  
I SHOULD HAVE GOT A CLUE WHEN THE KIDS STARTED SCREAMING  
YOU WALKED UP TO ME WITH YOUR BUCK TEETH A GLEAMING  
YOUR HAIR WAS ALL FRIZZY AND YOUR FACE WAS A MESS

I THOUGHT IT WAS A SACK BUT IT'S YOUR FAVOURITE DRESS

YOU HURT THE TREES FEELINGS AND THE BIRDS ALL FLEW  
I DON'T MEAN TO INSULT YOU  
OH WAIT! YES I DO.

YOUR TEETH ARE YELLOW, THEY'RE COVERED IN MOULD  
YOU'RE ONLY FOURTEEN YOU LOOK A HUNDRED YEARS OLD  
WHEN LOOKS WERE HANDED OUT YOU WERE LAST IN LINE  
YOUR FACE LOOKS LIKE WHERE THE SUN DON'T SHINE  
DID YOU FALL OFF A BUILDING AND LAND ON YOUR HEAD  
OR DID A TRUCK RUN OVER YOUR FACE INSTEAD THERE AIN'T NO PILL COS YOU AIN'T ILL

YOU'RE UGLY!  
U.G.L.Y YOU AIN'T GOT NO ALIBI YOU UGLY EH! HEY! YOU UGLY X2

WHAT YOU REALLY NEED IS TO WEAR A MASK  
AND BOOK THAT PLASTIC SURGEON FAST - (GIRL)  
YOU'RE SCARY - YOU'RE HAIRY I HEARD ABOUT YOU  
YOU'RE THE MAIN ATTRACTION AT THE CITY ZOO  
YOU'RE SO FAT AND UGLY WITH A BELLY FULL OF FLAB  
WHEN YOU WEAR A YELLOW COAT PEOPLE SHOUT OUT CAB  
(SO FUNNY)

YOU GOT EYES LIKE A PIG AND YOUR NOSE IS BIG  
AND WITH HAIR LIKE THAT YOU SHOULD BE WEARING A WIG  
UNCLE FESTER REMEMBER HIM? I NEVER KNEW THAT YOU HAD A TWIN  
YOU CAN'T DISGUISE YOUR GOOGLY EYES  
IN THE MISS UGLY PAGEANT YOU WIN FIRST PRIZE  
YO MAMA SAYS YOU UGLY -  
YOU UGLY!

U.G.L.Y YOU AIN'T GOT NO ALIBI YOU UGLY EH! HEY! YOU UGLY X2  
GET BUSY X9  
YO MAMA SAYS YOUR UGLY  
GET BUSY  
YO MAMA SAYS YOUR UGLY  
GET BUSY  
YO MAMA SAYS YOUR UGLY  
GET BUSY

YOUR UGLY!

U.U.U.U.  
NOW I FEEL LIKE BLONDIE

U.G.L.Y YOU AIN'T GOT NO ALIBI YOU UGLY EH! HEY! YOU UGLY X2

QUASIMODO  
CAMEL BREATH  
SQUAREHEAD  
UGLY!

CHICKEN LEGS  
PIG FACE  
CHIN LIKE BUBBA  
UGLY!

FISH LIPS  
TOAD LICKER  
POINDEXTER  
UGLY!

SPAGHETTI ARMS  
LIMP BUTT  
FREAK SHOW -UGLY!

U.G.L.Y YOU AIN'T GOT NO ALIBI YOU UGLY EH! HEY! YOU UGLY X1

U.G.L.Y - YOU COULD MAKE AN ONION CRY

U.G.L.Y - LIKE AN ALIEN CHASED BY THE F.B.I.

U.G.L.Y X6  
U.G.L.Y YOU AIN'T GOT NO ALIBI YOU UGLY!

During the singing portion Deidara threw clay spiders with smoke bombs in them around the class the smoke blinding Snape as Kailey,Abby,Naruto, and Deidara ran toward him took his wand and dumped a bucket of glue on his head making sure the bucket was glued on securely.  
"hee hee c'mon snape we're so gonna have some fun...un" Deidara said carrying snape over to where they had a ladder set up so they could hang Snape off the chandelier and have a nice pinata for their little party. Fred and George walked into the class room  
"ah ha so I see the first part of the plan is complete as for the second part..I think I should go first!" Fred said grinning as Abby handed him the pinata stick  
"Go ahead just watch it!" she warned as he climbed the ladder he was about to hit the "pinata" when the door opened.

~end of chapter~


	6. Chapter VI:Potions pleasepart 2

Chapter VI: Potions please, you mean PAR-TAY!(Part 2)

I own nothing like usual thanks for the faves and reviews :D(I'm pretty such I spelt the professors name wrong XD)

Professor Flitwick's head appeared around the corner of the door  
"Ohhhh Snape pinata!Move aside boys I call first hit!" he said scurrying into the class room.  
"awwww okay professor make sure to give 'em a good whack for us!" Fred said going down the ladder  
"Wait....better yet...Granger,Potter,Weasley and the rest of the class find a stick each and everyone of you then stand in a circle around the chandelier. Now hand me the pinata stick ." Flitwick said humming a tune as the class scurried around finding sticks,poles or anything smiliar.(meaning tons and tons of pointy and sharp objects poor poor Snape....XD)

"Okay remember students the swish and flick! altogether now!" Flitwick said raising his wand the students copying him  
" I scratch saying Malfoy the amazing bouncing ferret was the best memory ever this is better!"Ron laughed Harry laughing as well.  
" I agree !" Harry and Hermione chimed  
"Winguardium Leviosa!"Everyone chimed as the objects they collected floated up into the air and began beating up the Snape "pinata".  
"OWWWWW HEY!!!!STOP THAT!!!!!!!!!"Snape attempted to yell out but couldn't seeing as Harry,Ron, and Hermione had petrified him.

meanwhile:

Outside Snape's classroom stood Professor McGonagall and Professor Sprout both of them looked at each other worriedly as soon as they heard the cheering coming from the must be wrong there is noway students who had Snape would have this much fun.  
" I'm absolutely positively positive something is going on in that classroom and not something good either!"McGonagall said opening the door her face full of shock at the sight before her.

The class gasped as they stared at professor McGonagall shocked.  
"Ohhh whats wrong did I miss it?" Professor Flitwick asked as he waved his wand blindfolded attempting to hit the pinata.  
"Flitwick!?" McGonagall barked while Sprout covered her mouth on an attempt to stifle her giggles.  
"Headmistress!!!"Flitwick said shocked as he pulled off the blindfold blushing a bit the pinata stick hitting him on the head with a bang the students snickering.  
"What in the world is going on?!" McGonagall demanded entering the classroom which was now covered with streamers balloons and tons of party items.  
"I'm guessing Snape gave these students permission for a party..."Flitwick said rubbing his head.  
"Ohhh okay well carry on then..."she said exiting the class room Sprout following her. The students looked at each other for a second silence over taking the room.

Everyone then busted out laughing this was the best party ever.

~later on~

Nobody succeeded in opening up the Snape pinata to Flitwick's disappointment he was about to blow up the pinata when the students (with MUCH disagreement) stopped him seeing as they did not want to get expelled from Hogwarts but just in case they had Hermione do a memory erasing spell on Snape he is in the Hospital wing as we speak thinking he is a duck. The party lasted for the whole day long even the teachers joined in but eventually McGonagall sent everyone to sleep it was the perfect end to a perfect day....

~end of chapter~


	7. Chapter VII: Meet 2 new Professors

Chapter VII: Meet Professor Pervy Sage and Professor Granny

Early the next morning McGonagall called for everyone's attention during breakfast.  
"I have an important annoucnement to make. Seeing as Professor Snape is out of comission for the time being we have decided to divide his classes up and each and every one of you now have either Professor Tsunade," McGonagall pointed at Tsunade who stood up.  
"or Professor Jiraiya." She pointed her other arm to Jiraiya who stood up too.  
"WHOOOOO GO PERVY SAGE!!!" Naruto yelled where upon Sakura punched him.  
"As I was saying...Professor Tsunade will be teaching Muggle Sports,also called P.E. or Physical education down at the Quidditch field and Professor Jiraiya will be teaching Health in Proffesor Snape's previous classroom. You will have Muggle Sports if you had 2nd,4th,or 6th period with Snape. 1st,3rd,5th and 7th periods will have Health ."

*15 minutes later in Jiraiya's 1st period health class*

Jiraiya smiled slickly as 5th year Slytherin and Hufflepuff students made their way into his them were some well known faces such as Draco Malfoy,Sakura Haruno and so on.  
"Oh god...I can't believe I'm taking a class from Jiraiya! I'd rather go with Tsunade sensei..." said Sakura with a sigh.  
"Man I feel more sorry for the people who end up with Tsunade." Kiba said sitting next to Sakura and Shino sitting next to him.  
Sakura opened her mouth to reply when suddenly Jiraiya cleared his throat.  
"Hello class! Welcome to Health 101 with me the famous writer and ninja extrodinair:Jiraiya! I want you all to meet my teacher assisant, none other than the Kakashi Hatake!"  
Kakashi rose gingerly and raised a hand barley in greeting."Hi it's nice to meet you all." he said before sitting down again.  
"K-kakashi sensei!???" Sakura cried in shock as she ,Kiba,Chouji and all the other Konoha ninja in the room stared at him mouths open wide.  
"Yes Sakura?" he asked giving a look that said 'I -don't-wanna-be-here-either'  
"Why are you assiting Pervy Sage spread Pervyness?!"  
The kids looked around at each other.  
"What are you talking about,' assiting Pervy Sage spread Pervyness?" asked Pansy Parkinson  
"yeah what do you mean?" Others chimed in.  
"She's kidding!" Jiraiya said.  
Kakashi sighed,"Not my choice it was either this or helping out in the library witht that creepy librarian who kept..."He shivered at the mere thought of ending up in the library for hours on end with the lady who kept following him, was always looking over his shoulder and tried flirting with him.  
"Anywho I believe professor Jiraiya was saying something."Kakashi said after coming back to his senses.  
"Ah yes,Well first of all I want you all to tell me what you think this is!" Jiraiya said pulling out a playboy magazine.  
The girls gasped and the boys smiled.  
"If that is wha tI think it is, then it must be gold!" Kiba yelled all the boys agreeing.  
"How right you are Kiba my boy!Why don't you boys come have a closer look?"  
Suddenly the wall of the classroom broke and an angry looking Tsunade walked in holding naruto by the collar of his shirt Shizune and Kohonamaru walked in behind them both.  
"O-oh uh h-hi Tsunade didn't expect to see you here!"Jiraiya said backing away from her hiding the Magazine behind his back.  
"HAND OVER THE MAGAZINE NARUTO GAVE YOU!" She yelled .  
Everyone in the class except Sakura and Kakashi ran to the back of the room.  
"They're insane!Let's get out of here!" Malfoy yellled running for the door.  
"Hey calm down kid it'll all be over in a minute or so but I highly rcomend you all cover your eyes."Kakashi said calmly the class imediatley covering their eyes. Tsunade dropped Naruto and charged at Jiraiya.  
"YOU DUMB PERV!" she yelled and for the next minute all the students heard was the sounds of multiple objects breaking and the attempts of Jiraiya to try and calm Tsunade down.  
"Serves him right." Sakura said to Kakashi, Shizune , and Konohamaru who stood next to her.  
"Uh huh poor kids are gonna be scared for life though." Shizune said as Tsunade stormed off to the Quidditch field and the poor kids stared at the beaten up man their eyes wide and for the next couple of days they still shook when ever they heard loud cracking. carried Jiraiya up to the hospital wing a few minutes later after Pansy was sent to retrive the school nurse.  
"You all have homework! Name 10 reasons why I got beat up extra credit to those who can get your hands on a girl's bra and bring it into class! Better yet I'll excuse you from class and give you all a's for the rest of the year if you can get Tsunade's bra!"Jiraiya called out as he disappeared down the hall  
"I think we should ask for a schedule change!" Malfoy said staring at the broken wall.  
"For once in your life I think you're right Malfoy!" said a Hufflepuff who stood by him.  
"Agreed!" the rest of the Slytherins and the Hufflepuffs said

*20 minutes later down at the Quidditch field with Tsunade's first class*

"Alright twerps I"m not too happy right now so drop and give me 600!" Tsunade demanded as soon as everyone arrived. Her class was made up of Ravenclaw and Hufflepuff first years.  
Everyone stared at her blankly.  
"You mean we have to do 600 push-ups?!" one of the first years exclaimed .  
Shizune put a hand to her forehead.  
"No,no she was kidding! But just go and give us 20 laps around the field unless you rahter do the 600 push-ups."Shizune said and before she knew it they had all ran off and left her and a mad Tsunade glaring at her.  
"I don't like this new teacher lady!" said Melly  
"Agreed I think she's trying to kill us all, I mean 600 push-up's really? We're wizards here ya know, not pro football players!" said Ginger  
"Why'd you do that?" Tsunade demanded  
"Because someone's still mad about Jiraiya." Shizune said "Plus these kids aren't ninja's remember?"  
Tsunade sighed "You're right I cannot believe that old,stupid pervert tried to show a magazine full of naked girls to his classes!"  
"Well what did you expect him to do have them read make-out paridise?"  
"I wouldn't doubt that was next on his plans."  
Shizune smiled" Agreed. I felt more sorry for Kakashi though. Not only is he having to work with Jiraiya but did you hear that the weird looking librairian is stalking him and trying to get him to go out with her!"  
"Any one who helps Jiraiya deserves what they get."  
Shizune laughed"Then I wonder what'll happen to me for helping you."  
They kept on like this all day eventually Tsunade stopped trying to make the wizards do ninja stuff and before they knew it all their classes were over and they decided to go kick back at the bath house/hot springs made especially for the ninja folk on the far side of the school.  
The girls had all met up around 4 o'clock everyday and the boys met up around 6 o'clock.  
"Boy...this sure is relaxing!After all a long day teaching brats sure is tiring..." Said Tsunade little did the girls know their day was about to be turned upside down.

*Up at the castle in the room of requirement*

"Okay Harry did you bring it?" Jiraiya asked turning toward Harry.  
"Of course!" Harry said pulling out his invisibilty cloak.  
"Okay boys! Let's do this! Naruto,Harry, and Ron go on ahead! Me, Lee, Neji and Shikamaru will go next and then Kiba, Chouji and Shino will follow up."  
"Why-"  
"Raise your hand Neji if you want to speak!" Jiraiya said  
Neji sighed before lifting his hand up an inch above his shoulder.  
"Ah yes Neji!" Jiraiya said smiling Neji rolled his eyes.  
"Why am I invovled in this?" All the boys stared at him.  
"Because we need your Bakugan,ah yes Shikamaru." Jiraiya said pointing to the annoyed Chunnin whose hand was also lifted..  
"Okay so you have Neji's Bakugan, Naruto's...willingness, Harry's cloak, Ron carrying the Maraduers map,Lee's quickness,Kiba's pervertedness,Chouji's......chouji and Shino's bugs. Now how do I fit in this?"  
Jiraiya stayed silent before replying,"I don't know....Okay you can go free."  
"Good luck with your insane impossible plan and don't say I didn't warn you." Shikamaru said and exited the room as fast as he could.  
The boys stared after him.  
"Psh lucky..." mumbled Neji  
"Alright let's move out!" Jiraiya said and with that plan "Peek in the Hotspring" began.

To be continued!!:)  
Review Please! I want to hear what you think is going to happen next heehee I feel sad not telling you guys yet but you never know what could happen when you give Jiraiya a team of perverted and horny teenage boys(well I know but I wanna, yet again, hear what you guys are thinking is brewing up in Jiraiya's devious little (and I mean LITTLE) brain)  
Till next time,  
~momo~


	8. Chapter VII: Theyr eally want to die!

**Chapter VII: They really do want to die!**

**Disclaimer: I own nothing! On with the story!**

Jiraiya felt a heap of joy for so far they were going along smoothly they had gotten into the hot spring nice and easy and were hiding. At this point the other boys were waiting for Shino to drop a few bugs into the water causing the girls to panic and jump out of the water showing off their full glory and all the boys had to do was sit back and enjoy the show. Well after this little plan I'm sure Jiraiya would be glad to have said all went well but that would be a lie...A REALLY BIG one.

"Okay Shino on the count of three...1...2...3!"Jiraiya said and right on time shino let the bugs fall into the water. The problem? He let about...I don't know...20...30 bugs go?

Tsunade felt something crawl on her arm causing her to open her eyes the sight before her angering her.

"Okay girls do not panic..."

"What's crawling on my arm?"Hinata asked opening her eyes as well"BUGS!" She cried panicking.

"AHHH!"The other girls cried all panicking to get out of the water.

Tsunade sighed getting out slowly the first thing she had said not to do they did. She immediately began observing her surroundings she knew shino had to be here. She walked over to the other women and began whispering with them.

Jiraiya began to panic.

"Shino I said only let 4 go!" Jiraiya hissed as they hid behind a bush which was hidden under the invisibility cloak.

"Well sorry those have family and friends you know and they all wanted to die together!"

Jiraiya raised a palm to his head if they didn't get out of there soon they would surely be found.

"Okay whatever...anyway we need to get out of here..." Jiraiya said suddenly he looked around quickly. Where was everyone? Even shino was gone.

"Those little rascals!" Jiraiya growled to himself he looked around the spring again. Wait...where were the girls!

*in the changing room*

"So what's the report Hinata? Do you see them?" Tsunade asked

"Yes! The boys have deserted Jiraiya and are making their way to the castle! Neji sees us and Jiraiya's still behind the bush he doesn't know they took the cloak."

"Okay! Sakura, Temari and Shizune you go take care of the boys I'll handle Jiraiya myself!" Tsunade said storming to the bush where Jiraiya was.

*outside the Castle*

The boys took a second to catch their breaths.

"We've gotta hurry Hinata spotted us!" Neji said looking around.

"I told you it wouldn't work." Shikamaru said jumping down in front of them causing the boys to jump.

"Damn it Shikamaru I thought you were one of the girls!" Naruto said

"Oh really now. Well the girls won't like the fact you're comparing me to them." Shikamaru said lazily as two people showed up next to him.

"You can come quietly or you'll probably get a few broken molars." A girl said from behind the boys.

"Uhhh we don't-"

"I really don't see how you idiots could listen to Jiraiya. He's probably getting a present from Lady Tsunade as we speak. And unless you want one too I suggest you come quietly." Sakura said

"Aww man..." The boys groaned as they began walking back toward the hot spring.

Shikamaru smirked as he walked back into the castle his job was done.

As they got closer the boys felt sick to their stomachs as they could hear Jiraiya's muffled screams.

"Ouch wouldn't want to be him right now..." Neji said.

"Who says you won't get the same treatment?" Shizune asked as they led the boys in the girl's locker room where they found the rest of the girls locked and armed with their weapons of choice.

Naruto and the others paled as they were tied to chairs.

"Please anything but the permanent kind!" Naruto cried.

"Oh don't worry it won't hurt a bit." They giggled as they brought the lip stick to his lips.

~The next morning~

"Ugh…I will never listen to Jiraiya again." Naruto said as he and the other boys made their way into the Great Hall looking like complete clowns with dark red lipstick on their lips and around them, multiple colors of eye shadow, mascara and eyeliner not to mention blush.

"You can say that again." The other boys said as everyone broke out in laughter.

Meanwhile in the Hospital Wing Jiraiya sat up in bed. "I remember why we needed Shikamaru! He was supposed to fool proof the plan!"

Unfortunately it was too late anyways.

~End of Chapter~

I know it's not as funny as other chapter's but I was in a hurry so yeah XD

Any who in case you're wondering the girls did use one month long permanent make-up. Evil I know but hey who had those little boys peeking huh? XD Sayonara till next time!

~momo~

**Chapter VII: They really do want to die!**

**Disclaimer: I own nothing! On with the story!**

Jiraiya felt a heap of joy for so far they were going along smoothly they had gotten into the hot spring nice and easy and were hiding. At this point the other boys were waiting for Shino to drop a few bugs into the water causing the girls to panic and jump out of the water showing off their full glory and all the boys had to do was sit back and enjoy the show. Well after this little plan I'm sure Jiraiya would be glad to have said all went well but that would be a lie...A REALLY BIG one.

"Okay Shino on the count of three...1...2...3!"Jiraiya said and right on time shino let the bugs fall into the water. The problem? He let about...I don't know...20...30 bugs go?

Tsunade felt something crawl on her arm causing her to open her eyes the sight before her angering her.

"Okay girls do not panic..."

"What's crawling on my arm?"Hinata asked opening her eyes as well"BUGS!" She cried panicking.

"AHHH!"The other girls cried all panicking to get out of the water.

Tsunade sighed getting out slowly the first thing she had said not to do they did. She immediately began observing her surroundings she knew shino had to be here. She walked over to the other women and began whispering with them.

Jiraiya began to panic.

"Shino I said only let 4 go!" Jiraiya hissed as they hid behind a bush which was hidden under the invisibility cloak.

"Well sorry those have family and friends you know and they all wanted to die together!"

Jiraiya raised a palm to his head if they didn't get out of there soon they would surely be found.

"Okay whatever...anyway we need to get out of here..." Jiraiya said suddenly he looked around quickly. Where was everyone? Even shino was gone.

"Those little rascals!" Jiraiya growled to himself he looked around the spring again. Wait...where were the girls!

*in the changing room*

"So what's the report Hinata? Do you see them?" Tsunade asked

"Yes! The boys have deserted Jiraiya and are making their way to the castle! Neji sees us and Jiraiya's still behind the bush he doesn't know they took the cloak."

"Okay! Sakura, Temari and Shizune you go take care of the boys I'll handle Jiraiya myself!" Tsunade said storming to the bush where Jiraiya was.

*outside the Castle*

The boys took a second to catch their breaths.

"We've gotta hurry Hinata spotted us!" Neji said looking around.

"I told you it wouldn't work." Shikamaru said jumping down in front of them causing the boys to jump.

"Damn it Shikamaru I thought you were one of the girls!" Naruto said

"Oh really now. Well the girls won't like the fact you're comparing me to them." Shikamaru said lazily as two people showed up next to him.

"You can come quietly or you'll probably get a few broken molars." A girl said from behind the boys.

"Uhhh we don't-"

"I really don't see how you idiots could listen to Jiraiya. He's probably getting a present from Lady Tsunade as we speak. And unless you want one too I suggest you come quietly." Sakura said

"Aww man..." The boys groaned as they began walking back toward the hot spring.

Shikamaru smirked as he walked back into the castle his job was done.

As they got closer the boys felt sick to their stomachs as they could hear Jiraiya's muffled screams.

"Ouch wouldn't want to be him right now..." Neji said.

"Who says you won't get the same treatment?" Shizune asked as they led the boys in the girl's locker room where they found the rest of the girls locked and armed with their weapons of choice.

Naruto and the others paled as they were tied to chairs.

"Please anything but the permanent kind!" Naruto cried.

"Oh don't worry it won't hurt a bit." They giggled as they brought the lip stick to his lips.

~The next morning~

"Ugh…I will never listen to Jiraiya again." Naruto said as he and the other boys made their way into the Great Hall looking like complete clowns with dark red lipstick on their lips and around them, multiple colors of eye shadow, mascara and eyeliner not to mention blush.

"You can say that again." The other boys said as everyone broke out in laughter.

Meanwhile in the Hospital Wing Jiraiya sat up in bed. "I remember why we needed Shikamaru! He was supposed to fool proof the plan!"

Unfortunately it was too late anyways.

~End of Chapter~

I know it's not as funny as other chapter's but I was in a hurry so yeah XD

Any who in case you're wondering the girls did use one month long permanent make-up. Evil I know but hey who had those little boys peeking huh? XD Sayonara till next time!

~momo~


End file.
